Tuesday, September 20, 2011

The Ghosts of Jobs Past - Part 6

Ten random things I learned as a full time stay at home mom:

  1. There are a lot of things I will do for love that I will not do for money.  Change diapers, wipe snot, and read the same book over and over all fall into this category.  People who make their living serving the very young, or the very old, or the very sick deserve far more money, respect and gratitude than they get.
  2. My mom is an amazing woman.  She was able to raise seven kids on my dad's single paycheck.  What is even more amazing is that we all still like each other.  I am pretty sure there were times she wanted to smother us in our sleep. 
  3. I don’t care how remarkable your kids are, if you don’t talk with adults you will go insane.  Even lame adults are better than nothing.
  4. Childhood is both endless and over before you know it.  I am not sure how this works, but do your best to enjoy it while you can.  This goes for a lot of other things in life.
  5. You need to notice what your kids are doing right and tell them when it is happening so they can maybe do it again sometimes. 
  6. If the topic of jobs comes up in conversation with other adults, and you tell someone you are a stay at home mom, and they ask you if you have a real job, don’t strangle them.  Don’t yell either.  Just walk away.  They are not worth your time, they wouldn't understand either.
  7. You’d think “Dumbo” would be a safe movie to show a kid, but it is not.  In the first ten minutes the baby and the mom are ripped apart and then the baby spends the rest of the movie yearning for mom.  This is hard to explain to a sobbing pre-schooler.  We opted out of “Bambi”.
  8. Opportunities arise at the strangest times.  One of my kids insisted on nursing at the same time every night.  Luckily, old reruns of “Twilight Zone” were on at the same time.  I’m pretty sure I’ve seen them all, and that is a good thing.
  9. Whatever irritates you the most about yourself will manifest in your kids.
  10. You should always be the house where the kids hang out and play.  Just stock up on macaroni and cheese and juice boxes.  It is easier to spy on them this way. 
The Butcher


  1. This is absolutely fabulous, a classic. #9 is my current favorite but I can definitely see having rotating favorites with this list. Well-played, madam :D

  2. You are too kind. Thank you so much. My kids are 19 and 24 and I still think these hold up.